An Open Ended Question/Discussion

Sometimes I feel like blogs are too focused on narration, on statement making, and the self. I’d like to try something different. I’d like to use this blog post as a means to ask a question, an open ended question for any and all readers out there to ponder over, chew on, and if you’re comfortable doing so, to answer.

Yesterday I was listening to Lovegame on my bus ride home. Lady Gaga is not generally a source of inspiration for me (my thoughts on Gaga are a separate topic entirely) but sometimes ideas can be sparked by the oddest of things. As I was listening to this song, I was thinking about the lyrics, and how it portrays sex as a game, a trivial means for entertainment and “fun”. As I thought about this and how I disagreed with it, I kind of contradicted my own thoughts, chasing my own mental tail because I thought “sometimes sex really is just for fun, sometimes it is superficial”. I began to think about how many different things sex can really mean. For the sake of clarity I am, in this blog, referring only to consensual acts (which could include the role play of non consensual sex, and other kinks/fetishes/fantasies from all across the sexual spectrum). Sex could mean self gratification and affirmation of one’s own sexual desires, of one’s perceived sex appeal, it could be a simple fulfillment of a physical desire, like scratching an itch, or a demonstration of deep emotional feelings and bonding for one another, or a form of power play and conquest (not stating my personal views on that last one, though you can probably guess). I don’t necessarily think that sex only means one thing to each person, but I am interested in how other people view sex. What does sex mean to you? Is it circumstantial? Is it ever superficial or is there always something deeper (such as an affirmation of power/masculinity/femininity) even if it isn’t apparent at first? Is it socially constructed or are just some parts socially constructed? If it is power based, how do we move away from this and into more fulfillment based sex? Anything else you can think of on this one? I’d really love to hear your thoughts on this because I think the way individuals perceive and value sex is more varied than mainstream media (or Lady Gaga for that matter) would have us believe. Chat away!


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